My Eyes

 

Have I told you about my eyes? I can never remember.

Anyway, I wear glasses. I haven't updated my prescription in about 20 years. What I usually do is just photoshop new dates on old prescription forms, and get new glasses that way. Same prescription, even though my eyes have definitely changed a bit, but I didn't like the way my eyes seemed to get worse faster when I got a new prescription each year.

But my eyes are now a problem, as I can't see close up any more with glasses on. I just take them off, and then I can read things pretty well. The problem is when I'm driving and I have to look at my dashboard, I can't read it. I have to look over my glasses, which means I take my eyes off the road for a second.

Figured, this year I'll get a new prescription and if it's fucked, I'll go back to my others. I get a free pair of glasses every year so figured I'd use them.

I went to an eyeglass place for the prescription, and figured fuck it, I'll order a couple of pair from here, then get a progressive lens from the other place for free and see if I'm okay with them. These are the glasses that basically have a sliding prescription, so if I look straight it's my usual prescription. If I look down, there will be no prescription(so I can read close up).

We'll see how it works. I got the regular pairs already and I can definitely see things sharper. Still waiting on the other pair from my free place.

That was a riveting post, wasn't it?

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Fucking new years is here tomorrow. I think, out of all the holidays, it is my least favorite. I have never had much fun of them, and it always signals change(which I hate). I don't think we're doing anything at all this year other than going out to dinner.

Is 2023 going to be a better year than the past couple? I doubt it. I think it's all uphill from here, folks.

So, uh, Happy New Year or whatever.

My new year is gonna start out with the crazy diet. I've gained some weight, so it's gonna be time to knock it all off. It doesn't get easier, the older you get, I can tell you that...

 

 

Movies in 2022

 

 I don't really do top 10 lists, but here's a couple of lists about movies I saw in 2022. Odds are if the movie isn't on these lists, I didn't see it. There's definitely a few I meant to see but didn't.

Movies I Liked

• Top Gun Maverick
• Bullet Train
• Barbarian
• Doctor Strange Multiverse of Madness
• Avatar 2
• Guardians of the Galaxy Xmas Special
• Violent Night
• Spirited
• Black Phone
• Nope
• Fall
  

Movies I Thought Were Okay

• Thor Love and Thunder
• Black Adam
• The Adam Project
• Prey
• Werewolf By Night
•  Death on the Nile
• Ambulance
• Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent
• Samaritan
• The Fabelmans
• Texas Chainsaw Massacre
• Banshees of Inisherin
  

Movies I Didn't Like

• Jurassic World Dominion
• The Batman
• Morbius
• Deep Water
• Everything Everywhere All At Once
• Men
• Elvis
• The Gray Man

Movies I Hated

•  Scream 5
• Halloween Ends
• Don't Worry Darling
  

 

Bad Xmas

 

The wife is barely holding it together. She and her brother decorated their parents' house a couple of weeks ago even though it was mostly her dad that wanted it done. Her mom told her this year--don't worry about doing all that work, because it's  like the Griswold house--but the wife wouldn't hear it.

"We're not doing anything different this year," she told me, but she has tears in her eyes all the time now. 

My mom isn't even having turkey this year, which she has to know is a big red flag for me. She's having ham, which is sacrilegious if you ask me.

But I get it--most of the time, unless she has an early meal, I end up leaving before dinner to go to the inlaws for dinner.

So it will be again then. I'll go down with the kid around 1pm and leave around 4:30pm. We'll get to the inlaws' house, and there will be a grand total of seven of us for dinner. At a place that used to have around 30 people.

Everybody has either died or moved away, and it's been brutal.  Only good news as far as I can tell, we're not going to bother having the X-mas Eve present-share that we've done every year for the last twenty-five or so years.

---

Went over the Malf's last night. More chats, got some more advice on this anthology I'm working on, plus he gave me a bunch of ARCs for books he's gotten--he's getting inundated with them and can't possibly read them all.

He's still keen to make an indie movie. My new idea that popped into my head was this:

He's got a Xmas horror movie idea. I have a Xmas horror movie idea.

Neither of them seem like they'd be too long, so why don't we make a double-feature movie? Not an anthology, but just two shorter movies in one. Far as I can remember, nobody other than that Grindhouse has done it, and they were like two long movies...(and only one was good)

So I think we're gonna mull those over a bit. We're both pretty busy right now--he's finishing up his next book for Titan, finishing his band's new album, and also his basement flooded last week so he's been dealing with all that shit. 

Seems like time is at a real premium the older you get, right? Never enough of it.

 

 

Avatar The Video Game

 

Got out to see the new Cameron movie on opening night. Wasn't gonna but turns out nobody goes to a 3 hour movie at midnight but us loons.

Anyway, I wish ONE of these goddamn articles about the movie had mentioned that many showings are in high frame rate. Because we went to the best auditorium in this theater, the extra price one, and as soon as the movie started I looked at my brother who smirked back at me.

Smooth motion hell. 

Which is a shame, because the movie is gorgeous as expected, and while it didn't break any new ground story wise, it was still a fun watch. It just hurt every time the camera or any character moved fast on screen, as my eyes tried to pry themselves from my skull at every instance.

That's when I found out there were some high frame rate showings, and unfortunately my theater doesn't specify which ones they're showing. 

---

Went over to the Zig's and got to watch some Joe Bob with the crew. It's fun watching it with other people, rather than just online people. (or the wife, who--as much as she tries--really doesn't dig schlocky horror movies)

Was a little bummed they didn't do NOTC now that they have it on Shudder, but whatever.

Other than that, quiet weekend. I did a tiny bit of work to make up some of the PTO I took on Friday. 

Wanted to write but other than a few notes and half a page of script, nothing to speak of.

I keep thinking I HAVE got to get to work on a T1 and T2 blu--not the combined one I had done, as it's just too much to fit, separate them and then do a two-disc release. It's more expensive but I want it to look as good as I can get it.

Problem is, I have to do it on the old computer--my new edit laptop won't let the old program install. Fucking Windows.

 

 

 

Raise The Antho

 

Sooooooo, the big news is that today I had my performance meeting and I got the rare "Outstanding" rating that apparently not many people get. I do not disagree with this assessment, insert smiley emogee.

I had to demo an entire complicated process yesterday to the entire tester team, and everybody was impressed. They're all very confused now, but they clearly understand that I know what I'm doing so that's nice.

Anyway, today I got notice of my yearly bonus, which is substantial, plus I got the massive raise(really, the two raises I'd mentioned). It was more than I expected, honestly. Still, bittersweet given that it's just MORE validation on how good I am doing complicated shit that I really don't have much interest in doing.

Yay, me.

---

Got the first signed contract back from an author for the H'ween antho that I'll put out next year. Only sent out four of them and told them all not to rush, cuz I'm not even really reading the open submissions until after January 1st.

I haven't gotten THAT many submissions, maybe 30. I can tell you that people are stupid.

Two of these submissions don't take place anywhere near H'ween or have anything to do with them. It's insane. How do they not read the submission guidelines? I just deleted those emails completely. If you can't read the guidelines, I can't be bothered to let you know your story didn't make the cut.

---

Not really in much of a Xmas spirit. Will I start to get into it? Dunno. Am I just old and cranky now? Prolly.

 

Lead Tester

 

So had the meeting. Basically I only have to do the performance reviews for the three testers in my division.

But all this has led me to finally acknowledge a deep inner truth I've wrestled with for my entire life. If you're allergic to TMI, bail now. 

Thing is, my entire life I've wanted to be creative. My older brother was an incredible artist even when he was like twelve years old. I remember vividly that he drew a naked woman in his sketchbook while we were in a car on one of the summer trips my parents took us on, back when it was just us two kids. (before they had my younger siblings)

And the picture was great. I was like, how does he draw that good? How does he know what a naked woman looks like? I'm sure it wasn't as good as I remember, but considering he was only like twelve...

I was jealous as fuck. I started trying to draw stuff. I spent an incredible amount of time trying to learn how to draw, but I just didn't UNDERSTAND it. I didn't know how certain muscles looked, so all I ever drew were pictures I'd seen in comics. Eventually I tried to do more, but was never very good at it.

I wrote a lot. I'd started when I was twelve, and I was terrible. I got better, but frankly, not as fast as I wanted to, and I've never really gotten as good as a dude who's been writing for forty years should have gotten.

But thing is, I've always been VERY good at analytical things. Computer stuff. Understanding complicated things. It came naturally to me, the way art came naturally to my brother. 

My dad is like that, so I guess I got that from him. My mom--who I'm like in every other way--was always more artistically-inclined, even wanting to be an actress at one point. I guess my brother got her inclination.

So all my life I've known in the back of my head that perhaps I'd been kidding myself that I could do all the creative things I wanted to do. That I had any talent. I knew I really didn't--that any measure of success I achieved was only due to how much time I'd put into trying to be competent.

I've always wondered what would have happened if I'd simply gone into the field I showed talent in, instead of the field I wanted to be in.

And here we are. I'm now the lead tester in the most complicated(by far) division of this company, and that's crazy because #1) I've been in the company less than two years and #2) I have never tested software for any company, and frankly haven't tested ANY software in 30 years. Only things I ever tested were the games I used to make on my Atari 800XL.

It's proof positive that clearly I was meant to do this sort of thing, regardless of the fact that it's not really what I want to do. If I'd gone into this field even ten years earlier than I did, I'd be a millionaire right now, no joke. 

It's not a great revelation, as I've suspected as much for a long time. I guess it's just been hard to accept.

-------

Ugh. Merry Fucking Xmas season again.

Forced Up

I thought I had told part of this story before, but I went back to October and found nothing, so here it is:

Couple of weeks ago, my supervisor called me. Basically asked me to become the lead tester. What's involved in that, I ask? She says more or less three things:

Train other testers. I'm already doing that, I tell her. She laughs.

Approve timesheets. That doesn't sound like much. Sure.

Go over performance reports of the testers with them. Woahhhhhhhh. I tell her, I think those performance reports are a waste of time, and I've told you that, so it would be pretty hypocritical of me to go do that. I have no interest.

She's like, I understand, blah blah.

That was then. Yesterday my buddy in the company called me and said he's heard from the grapevine that since I didn't take the position, they're going to appoint the next senior tester in my division--that terrible tester from another company.

He's like...that would suck. And I laugh, and say it would never work because every day I'm telling her how to do stuff, and having to check her work. But he says it's gonna happen. And the position comes with a pay bump. (I've already gotten two pay bumps, and already knew a third was coming January 1st, so that would be four pay bumps in under two years)

So I emailed my supervisor back and said, "Give me the exact details of what I have to do and for how many." Because if' it's just the three testers under me in the division, I can probably do that. 

I've got an early morning meeting with her tomorrow, so we'll see what happens.

 

 

 

Publishing Early Days

 

Put out the call a couple of days ago. Went on the HWA FB, on a message board hosted by one of the tentative yeses for my book, couple of other places. Should be on Horror Tree and some other sites like that.

Haven't gotten many stories yet. Weirdly, the first story I read was pretty good. In consideration. The next story, from a FB/Twitter "friend", wasn't good. I'm gonna give her some notes on why it's not good, sort of as consolation.

Only got about five submissions so far, like maybe a day and a half. Expected more, but hopefully it's because people are thinking about what stories to write; I was half afraid that everybody was going to bomb me with all the stories that got turned down by all the other anthologies.

I have REALLY gone out of the box on a couple of these invites. I'm gonna go more outside of the box tomorrow, PLUS the Malf got me access to a legendary writer's agent so that I can see if this person might contribute a short story. Let's just say this STINGER could be my SWAN SONG. 

Thinking about trying to get a pic of each author in a Halloween costume as a kid and putting it over their bio. (it would have to look good in b&w)

----

Really feel like I'm getting burned out at work. I need to take one of these 10-Day vacations I've seen other employees go on. I have enough PTO by a lot. Hell, I could take around 18 days off with PTO at this point.