Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Fights, Part 4A

I decided it was bad to teach people how to commit crimes. At least, it is if I'm not getting paid to do it. You'll see in in HH2 or I'll take it to my grave. One or the other.

Anyway, people love hearing about my pugilistic past, so here's another.

I went to UMBC--University of Maryland, Baltimore County. I was invited to pledge a fraternity, but I didn't want to join, so I just partied with a buddy of mine who was already in the fraternity. Every weekend I went to their parties. It was like being in the fraternity without having to do any of the shit jobs.

One week I attended another of these parties. I got ripped. Out of my mind wasted. I met some girl and we got along, so we went outside to get better acquainted. We ended up around the back of the building in the grass.

Just making out. You know, it would have been like second base back then. I think today it would be considered a foul ball. I mean, think second base today is teabagging, right?

So, we're making out and I hear somebody shout out, "Hey!" I look up and some guy a couple years older is staring at us. "What's going on?" he asks.

"Nothing, go away," I say rather belligerently. Remember, I was a mean drunk?

"Let me see your ID," he says.

"Fuck off," I say.

He says he's the campus RA or something, holds out some laminated card. He says that there had been a couple of rapes on campus lately. "Now show me your ID."

I turn to the girl and ask, "Are you being raped?" She laughs and says no. So I turn back to the guy. "See, she's fine. Go away."

At this point he doesn't want to look bad by having me tell him what to do. He's older, he's got the authority. "Show me your ID or I'll call security," he says. I laugh in his face and tell him to call whoever he wants.

The girl pulls at my arm. "Let's go back to my place," she says. Sounds good to me so I nod. The guy takes a step toward me and says, "You're not going anywhere!"

I tell him. "Get whoever you want. You can find me at her place." She tells him her building number and room. It's not enough for him. He steps even closer to me. "You're not going anywhere."

Don't take my quotes as quotes. I'm paraphrasing from what I remember in my drunken haze. But this next part I remember vividly. It could have been so much cooler. I could have said something totally badass. But what I said was, "I'm leaving...and if you try to stop me, I'm gonna hit you."

"No you're not," he said. I turned to go. His hand grasped my arm. I guess I expected it, because I swung around immediately and punched him in the face. He fell back on his ass, his hands to his face.

"I'm cawing da pah-weese," he mumbled. I laughed and said, "Call 'em. I'll be over her place."

Then things get hazy. I remember walking to her place. Inside we got a beer and continued our make-out. It didn't go far. I guess I passed out.

I woke up to someone shaking me awake. If it was a movie it would look a lot like Lynn's POV in FOC where she wakes up after passing out. It's blurry. The picture focuses, and I'm looking at a cop.

The rest later.

Monday, November 27, 2006

Oops, forgot

Someone has asked me about this a while back and I forgot to post it. I took down the link a long time ago but it's still been out there hidden in cyberspace. The original HH diary--wow, I was such a nube back then...

Check it HERE!

Friday, November 24, 2006

I Think About Killing People, All The Time Part 1

I get questions from people sometimes about my first movie, HH. They're surprised at how authentic the killer seemed, at all the interesting insights about murder, and how to commit it.

I don't typically answer them. But I'll tell you, because really, there's nobody reading this blog, right?

I used to think about killing people. All the time. 24-7. I dreamed about killing people. I don't know why. I also wet the bed until I was 16, and I was enthralled with lighting fires--I burned down a significant portion of the woods across the street from me.

All of this is a bad combination. I was well on my way to being a serial killer. I know. Weird. I'm not being funny. In my high school/college days I was an angry, violent sociopath. Most people had no idea.

I think that perhaps without my writing I might have actually killed people. As it was, I wrote. I put most of my anger and violence into my stories. The stuff I couldn't get rid of, well, I got rid of it when I went to the bars and got in bar fights, which was a weekly event.

Where's this going? Well, in my late twenties I started to mellow. I don't think so much about killing people, not really.

But recently I discovered a great way for me--er, I mean Aric Blue, to nab himself another victim. I'll give it to you in the next post--the method's being incorporated into HH3 first.

(HH3? You're probably wondering. I wrote the sequel to HH a long time ago, but it's nothing that's ever going to see the light of day. Had an idea, wrote it down, doesn't really work. Now I'm working on another that I'd love to film if I had five million dollars and still talked to Ganz).

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

So S.A.D.

I dunno what it is. Okay, what I mean is, I didn't know what it WAS.

Ever since I was about 16 years old the change in season from summer to fall to winter would bum me out. And not like in a "Oh they put onions on my burger" kind of way. It's this deep feeling of sadness that's impossible to shake.

I feel like I don't have any energy. I never really want to do anything but sit around. I'm pessimistic about everything.

And then years back I saw an article on S.A.D. - Seasonal Affective Disorder. Go ahead, look it up. Apparently I have it. And no acronym has ever been more apropos.

It's just another reason I'd like to move to Texas. The change in seasons isn't so pronounced, so perhaps my S.A.D. wouldn't manifest itself so much.

I dunno. Too depressed to think about it any more.

Friday, November 17, 2006

Me 'N Horror...Splitsville?

Been doing a lot of thinking as I see more and more of today's horror. I'm thinking maybe I don't want to make the kind of horror that seems to be popular today.

Does that make me old? (is my first thought)

It seems that today's horror is mostly about torturing the protagonists. How bad can it get physically for them?

But the horror I grew up on spent as much time working on you(and the protagonist) mentally as it did physically. Look at John Carpenter's The Thing--ultraviolent, but most of all was the tension involved in wondering "Who's a Thing?". Halloween--really not very gory--a lot of stalking that led to killings. That was the formula for many of the horror flicks I grew up loving. The buildup was the best part--when/if someone died, there was a release of tension.

Look at most of today's crop: Hostel, Saw, Wolf Creek, Texas Chainsaw Prequels.

The protags are tortured, dismembered, killed in many cases. The tension comes from wondering what disgusting act is next, and if they die there's not a lot of release because once they start losing limbs you pretty much figure they're roadkill.

Most of those movies I just named, I'm not too fond of. Most of them I consider torture-horror. Saw, I think is an exception, because part of the torture is the mental torture each protagonist is forced to face as they decide what they're willing to do to survive.

I think at least half the audience would rather see the protagonists dispatched in some ingenious manner than see them live. And here's where I really start to fear I'm getting old--is that a good thing for society in general? When you have the young people--horror's main audience--rooting for the good guys to die, doesn't that make you feel a little weird?

So I'm wondering if the audience is dwindling for the kind of horror movies I want to make. Or is it just a cyclical thing, a return to 70's exploitation violence that will soon morph into a return to 80's-style horror.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

After Dark Horrorfest

This weekend through Tuesday, something's running at the theaters called the After Dark Horrorfest. 8 films running at different times.

I don't have time to see them all, so I'm trying to figure out which ones to see. I'm hoping that they're not just sucky movies that the distributors are trying to make a quick buck from.

Probably won't go until Sunday. If you've heard anything about any of them(the only one I've heard of is David Arquette's Tripper), lemme know.

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Quick Hits

FOC2(I will no longer ever refer to it in name--it will now be known as FOC2, which sort of sounds like Fuck You) is picture locked. An hour forty-two minutes is the final run time. The composer has it now--he'll be working on it while they're taking a break from "Lost".

I'm splitting my time between working on foley and working on the dvd supplements.

I've discovered that I don't have the...interest...that I used to have in doing them. I think a large part is how I recently discovered(see: FOC1) that the distributor doesn't give a shit about them. Sure, they WANT them--so they can show them on the back of the box.

But they don't actually give a shit about the quality of the supplements. Or how many you have. Really, they just want these: Making Of, Out-takes, and director's commentary. That's it. Deleted scenes are nice if they're short, but if not--they're gone.

For the first FOC I spent nearly as much time on the supplements as I did the movie. I had a Making Of, Out-takes, commentary, easter eggs, almost 45 minutes of deleted scenes with original ending, a 12 minute "Project Redlight" feature that was the best thing I gave them.

And they only used three of the ones I listed above.

So now I'm just trying to overcome my lack of enthusiasm by remembering: The supplements are for the fans. I'll try not to half-ass it too much.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Autism and Me

Yeah, so if your name is Stewie you might as well stop reading now. This post is about my kid, and I know how you are with the kid posts.

No, seriously. Stop reading now. Do not continue to read this post. For God's sake, I'm telling you, your masculinity is leaking away with every syllable. Stop.

Anyway, as I've mentioned here on occasion, my kid Logan is autistic. When they first diagnosed it I was doubtful, but now as I see other "normal" three year olds I can begin to see the differences. They seem to learn things faster than Logan. They pronounce words better.

As an aside--he can count to twenty, but he doesn't enunciate very clearly. He says a lot of stuff. Like, he was in bed last night and he was banging his television-cabinet doors together so I yelled from my bed "LOGAN, STOP IT! GO TO BED."

And I hear his high-pitched voice call out: "Sah-wee". Translation: Sorry. It's very hard to be mad when he does that.

Also, when you're mad at him he'll give you the sad eyes and hold his arms out and say, "Hug". Impossible to not laugh.

Anyway, they've now assigned a speech therapist to him. He babbles a lot and it's hard to tell what he's saying. He sometimes does the repetitive-phrase thing, mostly Blue's Clue's phrases.

So we're hoping that will help.

But I gotta tell you, from seeing some of his classmates, I don't feel so unlucky. It could be so much worse. There are kids three years older than Logan in his class who don't say a word and don't respond much.

Another aside: I really want to get him the T-shirt that says, "Autistic kids rock."

Come on--it's funny. And I feel like, for me, it's the equivelent of a black person calling other black people the N-word. People can't get upset at me for having my kid wear it--he's autistic.

And if you can't laugh at your own misfortune, it's very hypocritical to laugh at others(which is one of my favorite past times).

Sunday, November 05, 2006


The TV show. The best new show of the season. But I got a gripe...

...and no, it's not the coincidences all over the place, though that does start to nag. Maybe they'll explain it.

But the thing that's starting to bother me is the wise-man narration at the beginning of each episode. Really seems pointless. Like, let's just get back to the story and assume we can all follow what's going on without narration, huh?

And it makes me laugh that the guy doing the narration gets special billing at the beginning of each episode. Is he famous in some other country?

That's all. Gripe over.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Can't Take Credit For This

Found it on Peter David's website. Made me laugh, and I bet it'll make you laugh too.