My Eyes

 

Have I told you about my eyes? I can never remember.

Anyway, I wear glasses. I haven't updated my prescription in about 20 years. What I usually do is just photoshop new dates on old prescription forms, and get new glasses that way. Same prescription, even though my eyes have definitely changed a bit, but I didn't like the way my eyes seemed to get worse faster when I got a new prescription each year.

But my eyes are now a problem, as I can't see close up any more with glasses on. I just take them off, and then I can read things pretty well. The problem is when I'm driving and I have to look at my dashboard, I can't read it. I have to look over my glasses, which means I take my eyes off the road for a second.

Figured, this year I'll get a new prescription and if it's fucked, I'll go back to my others. I get a free pair of glasses every year so figured I'd use them.

I went to an eyeglass place for the prescription, and figured fuck it, I'll order a couple of pair from here, then get a progressive lens from the other place for free and see if I'm okay with them. These are the glasses that basically have a sliding prescription, so if I look straight it's my usual prescription. If I look down, there will be no prescription(so I can read close up).

We'll see how it works. I got the regular pairs already and I can definitely see things sharper. Still waiting on the other pair from my free place.

That was a riveting post, wasn't it?

---

Fucking new years is here tomorrow. I think, out of all the holidays, it is my least favorite. I have never had much fun of them, and it always signals change(which I hate). I don't think we're doing anything at all this year other than going out to dinner.

Is 2023 going to be a better year than the past couple? I doubt it. I think it's all uphill from here, folks.

So, uh, Happy New Year or whatever.

My new year is gonna start out with the crazy diet. I've gained some weight, so it's gonna be time to knock it all off. It doesn't get easier, the older you get, I can tell you that...

 

 

Movies in 2022

 

 I don't really do top 10 lists, but here's a couple of lists about movies I saw in 2022. Odds are if the movie isn't on these lists, I didn't see it. There's definitely a few I meant to see but didn't.

Movies I Liked

• Top Gun Maverick
• Bullet Train
• Barbarian
• Doctor Strange Multiverse of Madness
• Avatar 2
• Guardians of the Galaxy Xmas Special
• Violent Night
• Spirited
• Black Phone
• Nope
• Fall
  

Movies I Thought Were Okay

• Thor Love and Thunder
• Black Adam
• The Adam Project
• Prey
• Werewolf By Night
•  Death on the Nile
• Ambulance
• Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent
• Samaritan
• The Fabelmans
• Texas Chainsaw Massacre
• Banshees of Inisherin
  

Movies I Didn't Like

• Jurassic World Dominion
• The Batman
• Morbius
• Deep Water
• Everything Everywhere All At Once
• Men
• Elvis
• The Gray Man

Movies I Hated

•  Scream 5
• Halloween Ends
• Don't Worry Darling
  

 

Bad Xmas

 

The wife is barely holding it together. She and her brother decorated their parents' house a couple of weeks ago even though it was mostly her dad that wanted it done. Her mom told her this year--don't worry about doing all that work, because it's  like the Griswold house--but the wife wouldn't hear it.

"We're not doing anything different this year," she told me, but she has tears in her eyes all the time now. 

My mom isn't even having turkey this year, which she has to know is a big red flag for me. She's having ham, which is sacrilegious if you ask me.

But I get it--most of the time, unless she has an early meal, I end up leaving before dinner to go to the inlaws for dinner.

So it will be again then. I'll go down with the kid around 1pm and leave around 4:30pm. We'll get to the inlaws' house, and there will be a grand total of seven of us for dinner. At a place that used to have around 30 people.

Everybody has either died or moved away, and it's been brutal.  Only good news as far as I can tell, we're not going to bother having the X-mas Eve present-share that we've done every year for the last twenty-five or so years.

---

Went over the Malf's last night. More chats, got some more advice on this anthology I'm working on, plus he gave me a bunch of ARCs for books he's gotten--he's getting inundated with them and can't possibly read them all.

He's still keen to make an indie movie. My new idea that popped into my head was this:

He's got a Xmas horror movie idea. I have a Xmas horror movie idea.

Neither of them seem like they'd be too long, so why don't we make a double-feature movie? Not an anthology, but just two shorter movies in one. Far as I can remember, nobody other than that Grindhouse has done it, and they were like two long movies...(and only one was good)

So I think we're gonna mull those over a bit. We're both pretty busy right now--he's finishing up his next book for Titan, finishing his band's new album, and also his basement flooded last week so he's been dealing with all that shit. 

Seems like time is at a real premium the older you get, right? Never enough of it.

 

 

Avatar The Video Game

 

Got out to see the new Cameron movie on opening night. Wasn't gonna but turns out nobody goes to a 3 hour movie at midnight but us loons.

Anyway, I wish ONE of these goddamn articles about the movie had mentioned that many showings are in high frame rate. Because we went to the best auditorium in this theater, the extra price one, and as soon as the movie started I looked at my brother who smirked back at me.

Smooth motion hell. 

Which is a shame, because the movie is gorgeous as expected, and while it didn't break any new ground story wise, it was still a fun watch. It just hurt every time the camera or any character moved fast on screen, as my eyes tried to pry themselves from my skull at every instance.

That's when I found out there were some high frame rate showings, and unfortunately my theater doesn't specify which ones they're showing. 

---

Went over to the Zig's and got to watch some Joe Bob with the crew. It's fun watching it with other people, rather than just online people. (or the wife, who--as much as she tries--really doesn't dig schlocky horror movies)

Was a little bummed they didn't do NOTC now that they have it on Shudder, but whatever.

Other than that, quiet weekend. I did a tiny bit of work to make up some of the PTO I took on Friday. 

Wanted to write but other than a few notes and half a page of script, nothing to speak of.

I keep thinking I HAVE got to get to work on a T1 and T2 blu--not the combined one I had done, as it's just too much to fit, separate them and then do a two-disc release. It's more expensive but I want it to look as good as I can get it.

Problem is, I have to do it on the old computer--my new edit laptop won't let the old program install. Fucking Windows.

 

 

 

Raise The Antho

 

Sooooooo, the big news is that today I had my performance meeting and I got the rare "Outstanding" rating that apparently not many people get. I do not disagree with this assessment, insert smiley emogee.

I had to demo an entire complicated process yesterday to the entire tester team, and everybody was impressed. They're all very confused now, but they clearly understand that I know what I'm doing so that's nice.

Anyway, today I got notice of my yearly bonus, which is substantial, plus I got the massive raise(really, the two raises I'd mentioned). It was more than I expected, honestly. Still, bittersweet given that it's just MORE validation on how good I am doing complicated shit that I really don't have much interest in doing.

Yay, me.

---

Got the first signed contract back from an author for the H'ween antho that I'll put out next year. Only sent out four of them and told them all not to rush, cuz I'm not even really reading the open submissions until after January 1st.

I haven't gotten THAT many submissions, maybe 30. I can tell you that people are stupid.

Two of these submissions don't take place anywhere near H'ween or have anything to do with them. It's insane. How do they not read the submission guidelines? I just deleted those emails completely. If you can't read the guidelines, I can't be bothered to let you know your story didn't make the cut.

---

Not really in much of a Xmas spirit. Will I start to get into it? Dunno. Am I just old and cranky now? Prolly.

 

Lead Tester

 

So had the meeting. Basically I only have to do the performance reviews for the three testers in my division.

But all this has led me to finally acknowledge a deep inner truth I've wrestled with for my entire life. If you're allergic to TMI, bail now. 

Thing is, my entire life I've wanted to be creative. My older brother was an incredible artist even when he was like twelve years old. I remember vividly that he drew a naked woman in his sketchbook while we were in a car on one of the summer trips my parents took us on, back when it was just us two kids. (before they had my younger siblings)

And the picture was great. I was like, how does he draw that good? How does he know what a naked woman looks like? I'm sure it wasn't as good as I remember, but considering he was only like twelve...

I was jealous as fuck. I started trying to draw stuff. I spent an incredible amount of time trying to learn how to draw, but I just didn't UNDERSTAND it. I didn't know how certain muscles looked, so all I ever drew were pictures I'd seen in comics. Eventually I tried to do more, but was never very good at it.

I wrote a lot. I'd started when I was twelve, and I was terrible. I got better, but frankly, not as fast as I wanted to, and I've never really gotten as good as a dude who's been writing for forty years should have gotten.

But thing is, I've always been VERY good at analytical things. Computer stuff. Understanding complicated things. It came naturally to me, the way art came naturally to my brother. 

My dad is like that, so I guess I got that from him. My mom--who I'm like in every other way--was always more artistically-inclined, even wanting to be an actress at one point. I guess my brother got her inclination.

So all my life I've known in the back of my head that perhaps I'd been kidding myself that I could do all the creative things I wanted to do. That I had any talent. I knew I really didn't--that any measure of success I achieved was only due to how much time I'd put into trying to be competent.

I've always wondered what would have happened if I'd simply gone into the field I showed talent in, instead of the field I wanted to be in.

And here we are. I'm now the lead tester in the most complicated(by far) division of this company, and that's crazy because #1) I've been in the company less than two years and #2) I have never tested software for any company, and frankly haven't tested ANY software in 30 years. Only things I ever tested were the games I used to make on my Atari 800XL.

It's proof positive that clearly I was meant to do this sort of thing, regardless of the fact that it's not really what I want to do. If I'd gone into this field even ten years earlier than I did, I'd be a millionaire right now, no joke. 

It's not a great revelation, as I've suspected as much for a long time. I guess it's just been hard to accept.

-------

Ugh. Merry Fucking Xmas season again.

Forced Up

I thought I had told part of this story before, but I went back to October and found nothing, so here it is:

Couple of weeks ago, my supervisor called me. Basically asked me to become the lead tester. What's involved in that, I ask? She says more or less three things:

Train other testers. I'm already doing that, I tell her. She laughs.

Approve timesheets. That doesn't sound like much. Sure.

Go over performance reports of the testers with them. Woahhhhhhhh. I tell her, I think those performance reports are a waste of time, and I've told you that, so it would be pretty hypocritical of me to go do that. I have no interest.

She's like, I understand, blah blah.

That was then. Yesterday my buddy in the company called me and said he's heard from the grapevine that since I didn't take the position, they're going to appoint the next senior tester in my division--that terrible tester from another company.

He's like...that would suck. And I laugh, and say it would never work because every day I'm telling her how to do stuff, and having to check her work. But he says it's gonna happen. And the position comes with a pay bump. (I've already gotten two pay bumps, and already knew a third was coming January 1st, so that would be four pay bumps in under two years)

So I emailed my supervisor back and said, "Give me the exact details of what I have to do and for how many." Because if' it's just the three testers under me in the division, I can probably do that. 

I've got an early morning meeting with her tomorrow, so we'll see what happens.

 

 

 

Publishing Early Days

 

Put out the call a couple of days ago. Went on the HWA FB, on a message board hosted by one of the tentative yeses for my book, couple of other places. Should be on Horror Tree and some other sites like that.

Haven't gotten many stories yet. Weirdly, the first story I read was pretty good. In consideration. The next story, from a FB/Twitter "friend", wasn't good. I'm gonna give her some notes on why it's not good, sort of as consolation.

Only got about five submissions so far, like maybe a day and a half. Expected more, but hopefully it's because people are thinking about what stories to write; I was half afraid that everybody was going to bomb me with all the stories that got turned down by all the other anthologies.

I have REALLY gone out of the box on a couple of these invites. I'm gonna go more outside of the box tomorrow, PLUS the Malf got me access to a legendary writer's agent so that I can see if this person might contribute a short story. Let's just say this STINGER could be my SWAN SONG. 

Thinking about trying to get a pic of each author in a Halloween costume as a kid and putting it over their bio. (it would have to look good in b&w)

----

Really feel like I'm getting burned out at work. I need to take one of these 10-Day vacations I've seen other employees go on. I have enough PTO by a lot. Hell, I could take around 18 days off with PTO at this point.

 

Becoming a Publisher is a Lot of Work

 

Who knew?

So I've sent a few invites and now have 3 Yeses. Initials are GA(female), JB and KPB(males). I have some tentative yeses, and a bunch of non-responds. Nobody has said no before, and honestly I'd be surprised if they did because I'm paying more than anybody else is.

I've drawn up a contract based on a template the editor sent me. I've started putting the open call(that I had to write) out to places like HWA, Horror Tree, and a few others for the open calls.

My current worries are this: Might get too many authors saying yes to the invite, so might only have room for one or two stories from the open call.

What happens if one of the invited names turns in a shitty story? I don't wanna be the guy to say, "I know I invited you, but this doesn't really fit in." I'm not sure what I'm going to do if this happens. I could possibly save face by paying the author for the story and THEN telling them I can't use it. So they can sell it elsewhere right away, having already been paid for it.

I think it'll still sting, though. 

Or, do I just put it in, because the author's name will help sell the book? Guess we'll deal with that bridge when we get there.

My next big concern is the cover of the book. Let's face it, the cover is AT LEAST as important as who's in the book. It's the thing that catches someone's eye, that ultimately gets them to pull the trigger on the buy.

I'm trying to figure out how to go about this. My normal M.O. is to have the design in my head and go to the designer and have them make it. I don't really have an idea of what this should look like, other than to be full of Halloween goodness.

I don't even have a title for the book yet. I have a working title, but not sure if I'm happy with it so if you have any suggestions let me know. 

I guess I'll wait to get some of the stories and come up with the name before I look for a cover designer. I looked at some of those premade guys stuff, but the great ones have sold their excellent Halloween covers already.

Again, I don't wanna pay a dude for a cover and it turns out it's not good enough for me. It wouldn't be all their fault, as I don't have even a rough design idea about it. Maybe I'll put more thought into it.

Big Move

 

I'm keeping details pretty close to the vest, but I'd been mulling some stuff and finally pulled the trigger on it. Here's how my thought process worked.

I wrote a long H'ween short story. It's around 10K words, which is too many for any anthology or magazine I've seen. I was mulling over putting it in a book with some of my other short stories, but it just FEELS like it should be in a H'ween anthology.

You KNOW I love those anthologies. I read three of them this year.

My sudden thought was...why don't I just put one together with some horror authors I like plus some others who are popular? I could just pay them professional rates and publish this thing myself. It'll cost me some dough, but given who I think I can get in this, I'll make my money back eventually.

Besides, the bigger upside is that I'll have a story in a book with some bigger names, so more people will have a shot to check out my writing(and I'll put a link to my tubi movies also so who knows, might drive a few views there)

I've already reached out to some writers, have gotten a yes, a tentative yes, a maybe, and I'm mulling over who else to invite. Once I have a good stable of names I'll probably do an open call for a few other stories. I also got one of the bigger editors in horror on board as an editor, so he's been advising me on things I'm ignorant about.

---

The work slog is over. Far as I know, I'm free until mid January from the auction stuff. They keep trying to get me to go to their big January auction, but I have less than zero interest.

I'm wondering if they're going to hit me up last minute to do a video for them. I'll probably turn it down, especially if it's last minute. If they hit me up soon, then maybe. I don't want to be working through the holidays like I've done in the past.

 

These Should Be On Shirts

 

Nothing to say here, other than that these slogans that I saw at a patch shop should actually be on a shirt. I'd buy them.

ORAL SEX IS ALWAYS A GREAT LAST MINUTE GIFT IDEA

WOKE UP SEXY AS HELL AGAIN

DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO UNLESS YOU'RE NAKED

AS FAR AS I KNOW, I'M DELIGHTFUL(Really want this one)

 

This is My Title

 

I know...like, how do you come up with new titles after like 17 years of blogs? I'm getting bored just thinking about it.

The auction on Saturday was a disaster. There was some issue with the actual site that runs the auction--not on my end--and bidders kept getting weird messages that they were logged out, or their bid wasn't a valid bid. 

It cost the company I freelance for tens of thousands of dollars, AT LEAST. There was a very expensive, very rare doll that sold for a fraction of what it usually would sell for, and many people called to complain that they were trying to bid on it. 

We've seen them go for between $150,000-$300,000 but this one sold for $80K. I think our company is thinking about suing them. Sunday's auction went better, but was the lesser half of stuff so not as valuable.

Anyway, I'm smack in the middle of my 8 straight work days. After Saturday, I will have worked 18 out of the last 19 days. I mean, fuck this November. I'll get a nice little check, which is basically a bonus check since my work pays all my bills plus some.

But honestly, I'm getting very burned out. I feel tired ALL the time. I doze off for 15 minutes here and there when I sit down. I'm having health issues that I'm not excited about.

---

I put my novella up for free today, and it jumped up the horror/suspense charts very fast. It was like 3489 when the day started, and it's currently sitting at #10. That's right, top 10. I thought they had little graphics when a book was top 10 in a category. (maybe they don't have it for free books? Or maybe they got rid of them? No idea.)

And it's cool that it's THAT category. Like, my buddy Malf's book somehow got put into the "classics" category, so it went pretty high there. I say "somehow", but I know it's what a lot of publishers do to try to get high into a category.

Like, if there was a category called "Books With Cats That Fly And Shoot Laser Beams From Their Eyes", it would only have like three books in it, so that's the category you want to be in. Won't be hard to get to #1.

But horror/suspense is a broad, big category, and it's also correct for my book. Would be nice to get to #1, but I have no idea what that would take.

Oh damn, posted too quick. I hadn't checked in a couple of hours--it's at #7! Sweet.

 

 

Updated To Do List

 

Went back and found my old to-do list to remind myself what else I should be doing right now, but it's also a good time to see what I DID get accomplished.

Here's the list, with my notes--this was originally from December 1, 2020:

--Finish the book adaptation of the vampire script. It's basically done, but I'm just going through again and touching it up. Mebbe I'll let a couple of friends take a look and see if they think it's okay.

Hey, good news, I finished this and published it. It's gotten decent reviews and sold around 500 copies, which isn't amazing but who cares? At least this story won't die with me.

--Finish that Halloween story I started. I know now what happens in the end, just gotta get it down, get happy with it, and get it out. It's funny, the Malf gave me the title for it. He said it was one he was saving for it he came up with a story to fit it, but I could have it because it fit mine better.

More good news--I finished this one too. Bad news is, it's really too long to get placed in any anthologies. I was thinking about making my own book with some of my short stories, but my new idea is to maybe make a Halloween book that has my story, plus I'll just go ahead and pay other authors to put their work in.  I'm in the early stages of thinking about this, but I've reached out to some people about the possibility and for some info, cuz I know NOTHING about publishing a book.

--Revise that other weird story and send it out to somewhere to see if I can get it published.

Hmmmm, think I know what that story was and if so, it got done. I sent it to a couple of places but got rejected. Heck, I finished two stories and both have gotten rejected from the couple of places I sent them. I'm not too demoralized about it, because I'm pretty happy with how they turned out.

--Get serious about doing the Ttory 3 script, of which I have about ten pages of notes so far. Not that I think it will ever get shot, but because it occupies my mind. 

Wow, got this one done too. Man, I'm all of a sudden feeling pretty good about myself. I got a lot of this list done without even looking back on it.

-- Finish the Sharknado script. It's not Sharknado, but it's a pretty ludicrous premise like that. I don't want to put it out there. It's a little more than halfway done.

Fuck, spoke too soon. I only did a couple more pages of this, but it sometimes pops into my mind. Should concentrate on it.

--Finish that goddamn Halloween script that I've been working on for over 10 years. It's actually the origin story of Smiling Jack, though it was never intended to be. You'll see what I mean if you ever read it.

Okay, I haven't done a single thing on this one. 

--Finish the "Autasm" screenplay that I've been working on for 15 years, and fuck it, maybe turn it into a book.

Nothing on this either. I may let this one die, because I just don't know that I want to go into this subject matter at this point.

--Turn the screenplay that I was going to shoot as a movie last year into a novel or novella. Hell, might as well take that scarecrow screenplay I wrote and turn that into a novella too. I'd hate for nobody to ever see what I wrote, and it's too big budget for me to ever shoot.

This, specifically, is what I was looking for this list for. I couldn't remember which scripts were high up on my list of turn-into-novellas. I haven't done either of these yet, and out of the two the scarecrow one would be easier BUT...I'm already working on a scarecrow book...how much scarecrow is too much?

--Get serious about the other two books I started. One is a sort of time-travel thing--but in a way that I've never seen done--and the other is a sort of Under The Dome/Darkness At The Edge of Town kinda thing.

Another goose egg of work. I've done nothing on either of these.

--Maybe work on that superhero screenplay that dances in my mind on occasion. I wrote the opening years ago, and every once in a while I think of new scenes. Doesn't have an antagonist yet, which is the main problem.

Nope, but this one does tickle the brain on occasion. I have some ideas about it, and still love the way it opens. Still doesn't have the GIST of the story though, or I might give it a shot.

--

Other stuff I've added to the list since then:

Work on the Hell House script, as I'm calling it. This is currently pulling all my attention. Have written the first seven pages, and have another five pages of notes.

The scarecrow novel. This thing obsesses me. I'm writing a note or two about this EVERY night in bed in my phone. I've done the first ten or so pages, and then have another FORTY pages of notes.

Get back to the treatment with Malf so we can start on the script.

Continue to mull over the no-budget idea I had for possible shooting with Malf. He wants to do another fireside chat so we can go over some ideas and see if we can get on the same page for one.

 

Working Hell

 

 In the middle of it now. Shot a video on Saturday, spent all day working on it, then Sunday finishing it. 

(I also snuck out to catch Dawn of the Dead 3D in the theater with Zig--I'd thought I'd missed the opportunity, but it was still out there. Very cool to see it in a theater, and also the 3D was very cool.)

Then it's back to regular work, and then this whole weekend is another auction.

But hey, I guess I forgot to tell you a funny story about the ridiculous man who co-runs the auction company I do this freelance stuff for.

Couple of weeks ago I did a one-day auction for them, and it was the first one where they had a returning audience since the whole Covid thing started. Which I guess meant to them that everybody was going back to wearing suits and stuff.

Not me, baby.

I went in dressed okay. I wore slacks and a button-down shirt that I didn't tuck in, and then I also wore my baseball hat. I figured they'd have an issue with it, but I don't care. 

So this guy, we'll just call him Narcissist because that's his most-prominent quality, doesn't come over to say anything to me. Usually he'll come by to ask "how's it looking?", meaning, is it all working good, network quality strong? Not this time.

This time, a girl we'll call A came over to me. She said, "I'm not supposed to tell you he asked, but Narcissist wants me to jokingly ask you to take the hat off and tuck your shirt in." I laugh and tell her, "You can tell him I said No."

I know this has gotta bug the shit out of him, because he's a control freak used to getting his way. The rest of the auction he says nothing to me, including at the end when he usually has something to say.

So this weekend I go in to shoot the video, which stars Narcissist's mother. She started the company and is the head honcho, even if Narcissist is technically the CEO. Before we start the video, she says, "I have to talk to you about something and you probably know what it's about."

I laugh and say, "Yes I do, and the answer is no."

She's also pretty surprised by my answer, and says, "Oh, so you DO know what it's about."

I say, "Yeah, and I'm not taking off the hat."

She says, "Well, here's the options--"

And I cut her off--I smile, but I know she doesn't like being cut off. "The only two options are, I wear a hat at the auctions, or you get someone to replace me."

She acts confused, and tries a couple of tactics, but I keep saying, "Then you should replace me." She finally says, "Well, we can't really replace you because when stuff goes wrong and everybody's running around panicking, you're always over there calmly fixing the issue and getting us back up and running." 

Basically she knows that finding someone who can troubleshoot and do all the work required, and who also will only work 3-5 times a month, isn't someone who's easy to find. They tried at one point and it failed miserably. (they did an auction with NO video because stuff went wrong)

Anyway, convo ended with: "Can you at least tuck in your shirt?" So I said sure, I'll tuck in my shirt, and she said, "There, we compromised!" I was laughing my ass off inside, but honestly--I'm not far from just quitting it completely. If Narcissist says the wrong thing to me, boom, I'm gone.

---

Was interesting to see that book sales were down this Halloween period compared to others in the past. Wasn't completely dead--I made like $100--but that's way down from years past. 

Am mulling some other creative endeavors, but honestly I'm tired. Pretty much all the time. I don't know if this is just the way things are because of work and being on a sleep schedule that's not natural, or whether it's just because I'm not young any more.

The Malf still wants to shoot some low-budget ideas past me and get me to help him shoot and edit it, and possibly co-write. My point was this: Is he gonna do it under a pseudonym again? Cuz if so, I'm not really interested.

The problem to me is that he wants to make "a shitty no-budget movie", but I'm not into trying that. I don't aim for mediocrity, even though I certainly achieve it pretty regularly. I can't figure out WHY he wants to make one so badly.

It won't mean much money, especially if he won't put his name on it. Is he counting on MY name? Cuz if it's a piece of shit, I won't put my name on it either...

So I dunno. We gotta figure a time to get together, but my schedule is slammed now until November 20th. (I have a paid holiday this Friday, so maybe Thursday night, but other than that, I work every day until the 20th)

I mean, I shouldn't complain about all the work. I know a lot of people are having a hard time making ends meet, and for the first time in my life, I'm not.

It could all go away, I keep reminding myself. My company could lose the contract and I could suddenly become unemployed, though I doubt they'd want to lose me.

 

 

November. The Month Nobody Wants.

 

In mom news, she came home from the hospital and seems fine. She's already going out to the store again all the time, which seems to be her favorite thing to do. She hasn't gotten the results of all her tests back yet, so guess we'll see what's up then.

Work continues to be tedious, but I guess it's money. I also found out early that apparently I'm getting another promotion and raise. There was a spreadsheet accidentally circulated that showed me in a higher position than I'm in, so I asked..."Did I get promoted and nobody told me?"

They said it basically won't start until January 1st, but yeah. And as much as I don't want any sort of leadership role, apparently they're putting me as the Lead Tester in my division, which means I gotta handle the testers below me.

---

I ended up watching Halloween II with the kid, so at least he's now seen the first two. Maybe next year we do part 4 and 5, and maybe part 3 if we get a chance. I already told him Myers isn't in part 3.

The movie I helped produce and do some effects for is up on Tubi for free now. You can see it at https://bit.ly/fuzzyontubi 

It's called Shriekshow, and if you like no-budget horror flicks with nudity and gore, you might dig it.

It's a shame it didn't show up by October 1st--it was delivered on June 10 to Tubi, so took them literally 4 months and 11 days to make it live.

---

I'm in the middle of a long month. I thought I'd be working 19 straight days, because of regular work and this weekend I'm shooting and editing a video that needs to be up by Monday morning, and then the following weekend is the auction.

Turns out it's not QUITE that bad, because I get a paid holiday for Vets Day. I can get behind that.

 

In One Hour...It's Gone

 

I really don't know what my problem is. This weird depression that starts coming in even before Halloween is over. I wish it wasn't a thing, but it is.

Didn't help that it rained tonight, so there weren't many trick or treaters. No fire pit for us either. 

We watched Spirit Halloween, cuz why not? Turned out to be an all-ages Halloween movie, but it's only like 80 minutes long and my kid liked it, so I guess it's fine for the target audience. Chris Lloyd is in it, and man does he look old. I guess, who doesn't nowadays?

--

So we went to the bar two nights ago and had a good time. Took an Uber each way, which ended up being about $150 total. I'd figured it would get expensive cuz the drive to Towson is like 40 minutes or so.

Worst part was that we had an Indian driver(not the bad part) but he was playing Indian music. My wife's brother asked him if he could play some Halloween music, and he's like sure, and he punches in Halloween music in some Pandora-like app, and it plays like 85% cover versions of Halloween songs, NOT the actual songs.

Ugh.

We hung there until the band finished, then they wanted to head back to our neck of the woods and maybe hit a bar there, so we did that. But we got back pretty late, like 12:30, so we just hit the neighborhood bar.

Had a couple of people, younger like in their 30's, ask who I was supposed to be. I said Teen Wolf, and they'd say, "What's that?"

So just go ahead and kill me now. This was us at the first bar when the Malf played:

Then Sunday night one of the actors I know had his annual Halloween party. This will be his last, though, as he's moving to South Carolina. I took my kid over, but I wasn't going to drink much because I'd gotten pretty hammered the night before and the hangover was brutal.

I also decided, since it was outdoors, to wear the RJ MacReady costume. It's really good other than the beard. Man, for once I wish I could just grow a beard...

Anyway the house was decorated amazing. Had a bunch of food and was playing Halloween 1-3 on the backside of his house. There was about 20-30 people there, so a decent crowd. My kid would wander off and just start trying to talk to girls. 

It's weird how fearless he is. Completely different from me back then. If he had social skills, he'd have had tons of girlfriends by now. As is it, he just desperately wants one.

 Here's some pics from the party: 

---

Guess I buried the lead here a bit. My mom was going to Uber us, but I got a text from her around 3pm Saturday. Said she was sorry but couldn't take us because her left side was going numb. She was on her way to the hospital.

I asked if she needed anything, did she wants us to come with her? Nope, go have fun, sorry she couldn't take us. So that was sort of on my mind. They ended up telling her that she'd had a minor stroke and they were going to keep her overnight.

They kept her until Monday. Did a lot of tests on her, but didn't tell her much. She's got a ton of docs to open up and see what the tests say, but she has to go to her regular doctor for translation. Really feels like we have the worst medical system in the world, which is weird because pretty sure it's also the most expensive.

I talked to her today and she sounds fine. She's still a little numb and tingly on her left side.I'm gonna try to head down there after work tomorrow to see her. (I had taken off work today because, duh, Halloween)

Anyway...I feel like I should watch a Halloween movie I love, but it all sort of depresses me now. These weird funks are not fun...

 

 

Parties

 

Been watching flicks with the wife and kid. We hit Final Destination and the original Halloween, but I don't think much more than that. The kid has been staying over his "mom-mom's" house two or three nights a week to keep her company. They do puzzles, and had a cool Halloween one to do that was apparently very hard.

I, on the other hand, went into the office for the first and last time. I met up with my friend who offered me the job, and he drove. Traffic sucked--shocker--and then being at the office, especially since I'd gotten up at 6:30am in order to be at my friend's by 7am, was crap.

I was tired. The chairs there, while not cheap, aren't great so I stood a lot of the time. Then at lunch, my friend's like "Let go to lunch", and I made the mistake of not asking where. They went to Chipotle, which is garbage. I got nachos and cheese and I didn't think you could make that mediocre, but congrats Chipotle. 

Anyway, they had a party at 4pm, so everybody stopped working and got into costumes. There was a bunch of food and drink. I even had one guy's homemade Sangria. I don't like wine, but it wasn't bad.

The party part was okay, but I was beat when I got home. I went in 3 hours late the next day.

---

Did I mention that I'm now the only tester in the largest, most complicated component of this system? Since our company now got the whole contract, all the other companies got booted. Now we're scrambling to hire more people, but until then, I'm the only tester here.

When the tickets hit, I get slammed.

---

Tonight, going to Towson for the Malf's band party. It's at that bar that I used to go to in college. Couple of years ago I hadn't been back to this bar in 30 years, but this will be the third time in about two years.(This will be the second time Malf's played there, and there was an afterparty for one of Cutting's movie premieres there that I attended)

I spent a lot of money on this costume, but there are elements that I'm not sure are working. Couple that with it's gonna be VERY hot. I didn't mention, but I wore my backup costume to the office party--that's a teen wolf costume. It was also VERY hot.

So I guess we'll see how it looks tonight. We've decided since it's an all ages show to take the kid, so this'll be his first time in a bar or a real Halloween party...

 

 

 

Only 10 Days Left?

 

 Haven't watched a ton since last. Watched Res Evil 2 with the kid. He's been spending time over his grandmom's house so she's not alone so much over there, which cuts into our TV watch time.

I watched Dashcam(it was okay), tried Hellraiser(Hulu keeps losing my place, and I got tired of trying to fast forward my way every time I came back, so I gave up--not that it was bad, but none of the characters were interesting enough to put in the time). 

Went and saw Black Adam last night with the kid and my brother. It was okay. Meaningless fun, but miles better than anything Zach Snyder's put on the screen for DC.

----

Work is becoming super tedious. I see both sides of this situation, in that I wish I was in one of the easy divisions creating tests that a monkey could create. There's no much job security there, as many of them have found out now that the contract changed.

Instead, I'm in the hardest, most complex division. It took me three days to construct a 42-step ticket recently. The average ticket is like 10-12 steps. 

My brain was bleeding by the time I got done. But hey, no way they're gonna replace me because holy shit no other tester has any idea what's going on or how anything works.

Speaking of, there was only one other tester in this division with me, and we split the tickets by which component they were. I found out that today is this other tester's last day with the company, so all of a sudden I'm going to be the lone tester in this division.

My boss has said they're hiring 3 new testers, but that means until they get up to speed, it's all me. I'm not that familiar with the other component that was being tested in my division, so in order for me to do those, I have to go learn THAT component. I'm betting they're also going to ask me to train these new testers with what I know.

Fuuuuuck.

---

Hopefully a fun weekend. Turns out that pumpkin trail is happening. This is the only pumpkin trail I've ever been aware of, and was the inciting idea for the segment in T2.

I also have every piece for my costume, so have to try it all on and see how it looks. There needs to be some tweaking to some pieces, and I'm hoping it won't be too hot for the inside of a bar.

As always, Halloween is coming way too fast...

 

 

Busy Busy Even Moreso

Okay, so on the list of movies I've watched, it is thus:

• Signs
• 13 Ghosts(Dark Castle version)
• Resident Evil(original)
• Werewolves Within
• Jeepers Creepers
• Halloween Ends - this will undoubtedly go down as the worst movie I saw this year. 
• Jeepers Creepers Reborn - pretty bad, but compared to Ends? A masterpiece.
• Dashcam - not sure what I thought of this. Was too long, but had some good stuff, and the main actress--while annoying--was pretty amazing with those ad-libbed songs. (she ad libs the entire end credits, pretty entertaining)
• Smile
• Fall - way more intense than I expected. My palms were actually sweaty watching this. 
• Fright Night
  

On Deck: Frighteners, Resident Evil 2, Dark Night of the Scarecrow, Halloween 1&2(who knows, maybe 3 also if we get time)

We started watching Stranger Things season 2, since it's Halloween-based. (at least, the first couple of episodes) Not sure how my kid's gonna take it that we can't watch season 3 until summer since it takes place over the July 4th holiday.

Still continuing on the daily blog posts. I'm only about two posts ahead of the day, so it'll be interesting to see if I can keep coming up with stuff to fill all 31 days.

 Didn't think I'd leave you high and dry with no sexy 'ween, did you? (that's supposedly Lily Munster herself, Y DeCarlo)

Busy Busy

 

The wife decorated the house for Halloween. Had to rejigger our setup because we got a new couch in that room, which had us removing our TV stand(which held a ton of decorations on top).

Got out two nights ago to shoot some pics because it was a paid holiday on Monday. We didn't go far--had a cemetery I was curious to check out plus an old church and cemetery, and see what else was around.

The first cemetery--turns out, it FLAT. Like...there are almost NO tombstones. Just flat headstones. So not much to take a picture of. The old church at the other place was decent, and THAT cemetery is very old. You can feel it.

Here's the decent pics I shot. Not many.

Been watching some movies with the kid, sometimes with the wife. We watched Signs and Werewolves Within.

On my own, started that new Hellraiser. It's okay so far, but I'm not blown away like most of my friends. I was never that big a fan of the original, so maybe it's just not my bag.

---

Went over the Malf's for a long-overdue chat. Ran the gamut from writing to band stuff to movie stuff. The Malf was pretty drunk by the time I left. He gave me a copy of his new book that I haven't read yet.

Also spawned an idea in his brain that he got pretty excited about. He might make it his next book, he said. 

We may finally begin work on that screenplay we'd talked about collaborating on a few years back.

---

Did I tell you I started writing new anecdotal posts about making movies on FB? Figured I'd do it every day of October to help pimp the movies. I'm about two days ahead of the posts, but am a little afraid I'm gonna run out of stuff to write...

I posted a non-FB version that I update every day or so when I post:

https://bit.ly/kkanecdotes

 

 

 

It's already coming too fast...

 

Yes, my favorite holiday. Sure, it's only four days into October, but I'm already behind on the watching.

I DID finish one of the H'ween based books. Wasn't great.Sort of expected better from this well-regarded author.

Started ANOTHER book, this one an anthology of H'ween stories. So far none of them have blown me away, but they're not bad. Entertaining enough.

Last night I watched the 4K of Fright Night with my kid, since he'd never seen it. He enjoyed it. As always, I noticed little things I'd never noticed before, mostly filmmaker stuff. It also took me back to when I watched this film seated right behind Holland and Ragsdale at a convention in Texas.

That's all the horror flicks I've watched so far, though I've seen a couple of H'ween episodes of shows.

Can't remember if I mentioned, but discovered a show I used to love is on Hulu. The Practice. Started rewatching it, and discovered another favorite show I've wanted to rewatch is also on there: Picket Fences. (both are shows from David Kelley)

Finished the first two seasons of the Practice in like a week. Watched the first seven eps of Fences(and there was a H'ween episode that's a lot of fun)

Want to get out to the theater and see the new Smile movie but it's been pretty busy. I'm not gonna deal with people on this one, at least not right near me.

---

Been doing anecdotal posts on FB about my moviemaking career, which is clearly winding down. While part of me still yearns to go make stuff, part of me is like "Isn't enough enough? It's a young man's game..."

So who knows? How many blogs do I end with that sentence, I wonder?

 

 

Man, Woke Is Definitely Bad

 

The verdict is in, and it's definitely bad. Exhibit A for the nail in the coffin on this is Big Brother.

I've been watching this show since it debuted around 24 years ago. My wife enjoys it too. It's had its ups and downs, but most years it's pretty enjoyable.

Yet the last couple of years they've been getting pretty involved in creating scenes where they can get very preachy about racism or sexism or any other ism they're looking to shine a light on. Thing is, this is Big Brother, not where I go to be educated about that shit.

Most of the time we can just fast forward through those dull and embarrassingly-unsubtle messages.

This year, something happened that just blows my mind. And the fact that everybody, including the person who DID NOTHING WRONG, decided this was a TERRIBLE thing...

Some background, and mind you, these are facts. Not my opinions. Don't believe me, go look it up.

Last year a group of the black contestants in the house decided to form a secret alliance to try to make sure a black contestant won the game, since most of the time they haven't. This alliance was called The Cookout.

They did, in fact, win the game, as one of their members was the winner. And see, I have no problem with this. It's a viable strategy, and clearly worked.

This year, early on, a white player was talking with another white player and debating about whether another "cookout" was forming, as there were some strong black players in the game who seemed to be pretty chummy. This white player debated about whether they should form a white alliance.

Now, no alliances ended up forming based on color, but at one point late in the game it came out that this guy had considered it, and let me tell you--they nearly crucified him for it. Everybody was shouting RACIST stuff at him and saying how they couldn't believe he'd do such a thing.

He even apologized and said he was working real hard on himself blah blah blah. He was booted out of the game that week.

Uhhhhhh...I'm completely open to hearing HOW I'm wrong here, but if people can form an alliance based on a color, then ANY color should be able to form an alliance. That's how you fight racism. Not by overcompensating and saying that white people can't even DISCUSS the notion that the black people might form an alliance and win the game, which is EXACTLY what happened last year.

I know it would be a bad optic if a white alliance formed to beat the black people in the game, but that's all it is--an optic. You cannot on the one hand say "black people can form an alliance, and white people cannot", because THAT is racism, and that's the kind of racism that gets people like me--who are pretty socially progressive--to start pulling away from your side.

The woke-ism wasn't done though. In the end there were two players left standing, a black man and a black woman. The black man was WAY better than the woman, having won more competitions(not even close) and having won the final HOH.

But guess who won the game? The woman, because the women jurors voted for the woman because "it's their time"(that's what one woman said), and then some of the salty jurors(people who were evicted from the house) voted against the guy because he was responsible for kicking them out.

That's right--you're supposed to vote for the best player, not the player you want to win. Yet they did. This happened once before and got me pretty pissed, but this is the end.

I'm not investing 3 months in a show only to watch the lesser-contestant win due to how people feel. All the women really showed is that they were, in fact, inferior in this competition and unable to admit it. If it had been close, I wouldn't have an issue. 

He won 5 competitions to her 2. He evicted the BIGGEST threat to win a few weeks earlier--a guy who was unstoppable, and breaking BB records all over the place. She didn't do much other than cry a lot and pretend she was good at the game.

Anyway, this is going to free up a lot of my time next summer, so that's nice.

--

In other tick-me-off stuff, I get pressured every once in a while by various friends who want me to make another movie. I'm not talking about when someone just asks me if I'm working on something.

I'm talking people who are like "Let's go make a movie" or "You gotta get back out and make another movie."

What these people don't understand is the sheer amount of work involved in finishing a movie that costs under $20K. It's the reason I have to take on so much work to do it--can't pay someone, then I have to do it myself.

I'm not sure if I have it in me anymore.

I'm not saying I'm single-handedly responsible for making all seven movies, though that wouldn't be too far from accurate. I've had some incredible help, and without them I wouldn't have been able to make the films.

But I've spent many lonely nights writing or editing or working on VFX or breaking down schedules or dealing with casting stuff, or going to locations by myself and recreating foley sounds, or going out to the woods to location scout by myself.

 Many many other things that are involved when you can't pay people to do this stuff.

 I'm starting to draw a line. I want a producer, one who can help secure locations and deal with some other headaches. Basically, a ME who's more social that doesn't want to write or direct.

They're hard to come by.