Thursday, June 25, 2009

Eff M.J.

Man, am I already sick of "Oh, R.I.P. Michael! The king of pop is dead!"

He was a pedophile. Had enough money to stay out of jail, but it's for sure. Yet people are lamenting the loss of a great man...

Let me lay it out for you: This guy ruined countless children's lives by luring them to his wonderland so he could touch them.

But hey--he sang a bunch of cool tunes we enjoyed growing up! I'm sure it all balances out, right?

Monday, June 22, 2009

Father's Day

Went to the in-laws for a little improptu cookout. The wife and kid, her parents, her brother and his wife and kid, and their cousin Denise. Burgers and dogs, eaten on the outside patio table.

Should have known better.

It all started well enough. By the time I got there the food was already on the grill, so I didn't have to cook any of it. Ate my burger. Sat around and listened to the chit chat.

The after-dinner cleanup. I'm sitting there and I hear a THUMP to my right--I look over. My mother-in-law is half-in/half-out of the door. In front of her on the ground is the cake that she apprarently dropped icing-down.

She looks like she's going to cry. She runs inside. Then my father-in-law sees it and he freaks out. He's a bit like a ten-year-old who just looks 65 years old. He stomps his foot and looks like he's about to cry.

He goes in after his wife. The whole thing becomes an episode. It's a huge deal. My wife picks the cake up and makes an improvised cake using the half of cake that didn't hit the ground, some mini-cupcakes, and some cookies.

Crisis sort of averted. Everyone returned to the table, but my father-in-law was still so upset that even after some of his "happy pills" he was visibly shaking.

I go down to amuse my kid who is playing in the pool, and when I come back up my wife's cousin is crying. Her mom died a few months back and she's been a mess since then.

I try to act like I don't notice her sobbing oustide on the chair. I go back down and play with my kid a little more.

Time for me to go. I head back up and don't see anyone outside, so I head inside to the kitchen...

...where the cousin is sobbing some more while my wife and her mom try to comfort her.

I again try to act like I don't notice her sobbing. I say I have to go, and I do.

Just another Father's Day.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

An Important Question

I get tips sometimes about companies that are looking for scripts. This came across my email:

We are looking for completed feature-length Ninja scripts in a contemporary or near future setting. No period Ninjas, please. Submissions should be for material that is heavy on action and Ninjutsu, and should feature or be written for a Caucasian lead. Please do not submit unless your story is actually about real Ninjas. Assassins, SEALs, and other assorted stealthy characters are not Ninjas, and we're not looking for stories that can be "easily adapted."

An important question occurred to me: Why the hell haven't I written one of these?

Totally up my alley...

Sunday, June 14, 2009

The Internet Must Die. And Yet...

Tivo missed Harper's Island this week. I don't know why.

In case you missed it, HI is one of the most fun shows on TV right now. It's about a bunch of people who arrive on an island(think Ten Little Indians, not Gilligan's) for a wedding, and then start getting killed off one by one.

The characters are written pretty well. They introduce about 25 charactes, and by episode two you're not really lost at all. You can keep track pretty well.

Some of the deaths are gory. It's a good time, and you should check it out. Download it.

That's where I'm going. I was able to run off and download that badboy right away.

So the internet is good.

And yet, the main reason that movie distribution has become such a nightmare is due to piracy over the internet. The studios don't want to buy many low-to-no budget features not just because there's a glut of them(though there is that), but because internet piracy is finally doing to movies what it did to the music industry years back.

There was a time when it just wasn't feasible to download whatever movies you wanted, but with hi-speed internet it's now the reality.

There's a lot of talk amongst the moviemakers about what to do. Most of it involves do-it-yourself distribution coupled with selling ad revenue. To me, that sounds like a lot more work. I already made the movie--now I gotta do ANOTHER job because people are breaking the law?

Many people are taking the approach that it's too late--we can't stop people from pirating movies. Might as well try to work with it. My thought on this is that I hope rape and murder don't become too hard to stop. I guess we'll just give up and try to work with it.

I think part of the answer lies with the cable and internet provider companies. They have the ability to throttle accounts--meaning, they can see who's uploading and downloading a ton and slow that down, put a cap on it. They don't want to say they can do this--then the onus of doing something will land on them, and the movie studios will put pressure on them to do so.

But I had a chat a while back with a lawyer who was dealing with the cable companies about this. And he said it's exactly what's happening.

Sooner or later they're gonna make you pay for how much bandwidth you use. You may say that's crazy, but how's your cell phone bill lately? The more you use, the more you pay.

This won't fix everything. It will slow some people down. But I'm sure there will be an all-you-can-download package per month--just like cell phones--so how effective it would be is up in the air.

I don't know. Wish I had an answer.

Monday, June 08, 2009

Procrastinator

While I've been finishing up Project X I've been procrastinating on my writing. I have a lot to do. I've got about ten unfinished scripts and three ideas for new ones.

So here's the list. And no, you probably won't know what I'm talking about by the shorthand. (the first you probably will)

Finish HH3.
Finish Doll One.
Finish Ghost One.
Finish Kill God One.
Finish Backyard.
Finish Vcock.
Work on Ship idea.
Work on Island idea.
Start Thief one.

I also have to rework two finished scripts.

But I just started watching the first season of Sons of Anarchy. Blazed through it in a couple of days. It's pretty good.

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Funnies

Two quick things. Saw a billboard that was pretty funny:

YOUR WIFE IS HOT
(Time to get the A.C. fixed)

Caught my attention, then made me chuckle. An ad for an AC repair company.

The other is a commercial. Don't know what it is, but they "really want you to try Aciphex".

And yeah, it's pronounced Ass-FX.

In other news, the composer from FOC1 and 2 is gonna try his hand on my new flick. No real music per se, but sound design. I think we're about 8 weeks away from completion. Maybe I'll have a little premiere in late July.